Dentist
I went to the dentist last Thursday.It was something that had been swimming around my head and my molars for some time now.
My last dental visit was in the summer of 2000. I had a pretty great check up back then and I was worried that the last four years of drug abuse and general debauchery had fucked up my teeth something fierce.
There was one place in particular on the upper right side where I could insert the tip of my fingernail. I thought for sure that it was a cavity and I figured that it couldn't be my only one.
Well as it turns out, after all that time away from dental cleaning, and like I say, ingesting all manner of horrible substance, and smoking a fair, if not a copious amount.
I don't have any cavities.
FU tooth decay.
The place that was gaping that I could gage with my nail was just brush abrasion. Apparently I don't know my own strength when it comes to brushing. That did require an aesthetic fill but that was easy enough and they have these video glasses at my dentists' office that you can slip on when you are having a lengthy procedure and you can just drift off into movie majick while they scrape and drill and fill your shit. And my dentist is a lady and she's kind of hot and really nice.
I wasn't really worried cause I was told, back in the day, that I have a very acidic ph balance in my body and that makes for very acidic saliva which is not very friendly towards tooth decay and the germs that cause gingivitis. Plus, my obsessive compulsive tendencies manifest themselves in my oral hygiene habits.
When I'm nervous, I brush or floss. That's a great way of making your mental health weaknesses work for you, you should try it.
sidenote ~
My dentist said that I remind her of the supporting role from the movie Serendipity
which I had never seen, but it turns out that she means Jeremy Piven
who is playing a character called Ari on one of my favorite new shows, Entourage
which I suppose is an accurate assessment
cause we both have short thin hair
and much like most of the characters that Jeremy Piven plays
I too am a real dick.
but I prefer the other star that people have been comparing me to
which is Party Boy, Chris Pontius.
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